My landlord recently upgraded my toilet. When I told my dad this was going to happen his wish for me was that I receive a Toto Toilet, the best of the best. A few hours later, much to my surprise, I learn that I am getting a Toto! I decided to share this with my parents who were in the car en route to Boca, naturally. I texted my dad “I’m getting a Toto!” He read it quickly, and mistakenly thought I wrote “I’m getting a tattoo.” He relayed this distressing news to my mother. This is the voicemail I received.
Click above to play the message. If you have difficulty deciphering feel free to utilize the transcript is below.
Dad: Lauren, NO! NO!
Mom: You wanna poison yourself? And I-
Dad: NO!
Mom: You could never be buried in a Jewish, uh, cemetery with a Tattoo.
Dad: NO. Mom: What are you outta your mind!?!?
I could not make this up.
Happy New Year everyone!!
